What can I do to help my child when they are always overthinking what is wrong with them?

Short answer

Self-critical thoughts can grow when a child knows things are hard but cannot explain why.

What this can look like

Your child may say harsh things about themselves when they cannot explain why ordinary tasks feel hard.

Why it can happen

Move gently from “what is wrong with me?” to “what is hard, what helps and who can help us learn more?” Keep the child’s dignity at the centre.

What might help

Name the difficulty as a problem to solve together, not a problem with them.

What the research helps explain

A broad pattern in a child can be shaped by development, learning, health, stress, sleep, relationships, environment and support. Public information can help a family ask better questions and try safe practical changes; it cannot decide what label, if any, applies.

What can vary

Do not compare children, diagnose from a pattern or make them prove a difficulty. Persistent, severe, sudden or concerning changes deserve appropriate advice from a qualified professional who knows the child’s context.

For this situation

For you, avoid turning family research into a label hunt in front of your child.

More info and original sources

Poko summarises the relevance of public original sources and links out for anyone who wants to read more.

• Executive Functions — Explains attention, working memory and flexibility as developing, context-sensitive processes.
• About psychosocial hazards — Provides a conditions-focused framework for understanding how demands and supports affect functioning.