Good Systems · public information library

How can I help someone when they keep moving the goalposts after they meet them?

People come here to understand why something in everyday life feels harder, different or more costly than it should — and what might make it work better.

Short answer

Make the finish line visible and return to it when the target keeps moving.

What this can look like

They may meet the original goal, then immediately see a better version they could make.

Why it can happen

After a goal is met, someone may notice a new imperfection rather than the original success. A written purpose and agreed threshold can help decide whether more work changes the result enough to matter.

What might help

Bring the conversation back to the agreed purpose. Ask whether the extra work will materially change the outcome or simply delay finishing.

What the research helps explain

Research and public guidance describe perfectionism and overcontrol by their impact on finishing, flexibility, relationships and quality of life. High standards can be useful; a public page cannot determine whether a person has OCD, OCPD, anxiety or another experience.

What can vary

The same behaviour can have different meanings in different contexts. Do not label, diagnose or pressure someone to relax standards they value; focus on the cost, choice and support they want.

For this situation

For you, reflect the progress you can see without forcing praise they do not believe.

More info and original sources

Poko summarises the relevance of public original sources and links out for anyone who wants to read more.